MY LIFE IS ABOUT TO CHANGE

     Today my oldest daughter goes to the license branch to take the driving test. How does a life change when children can drive themselves? My hope is that she will choose to be a responsible driver and I think she will be. I have worked with her for the past two years, practicing everything I think she might encounter.
     I learned something from a friend of my son who is now thirty and a decorated war veteran. He said that if someone jumped in his car, he would make them reject it. He was in control of a one ton lethal weapon. He would drive so that the person would be begging to get out. So, I have taught my daughter that a car is a lethal weapon. Use it carefully. Don't hurt yourself or others.
    I have increased worry with her starting to drive because a friend of hers just had an accident. Her mom trusted her driving, too. She missed a corner and went into a ditch, breaking her twelveth vertebrae. She will recover, but it has changed their lives. Four months in a back brace is a long time, especially walking with a cane.
     From now on, she will be able to take herself to violin practice, choir, 4-H, and the orchestra. I will have more time at home to take care of the other children and the house. She will be able to get a job. She can even help by running errands for me. I can see a lot of positives coming out of this.
     So today I will say a prayer that God will protect my oldest daughter and help her to make good decisions in her driving and her life. It isn't easy letting go and letting God take over, but it's a part of life, when the only thing a parent can do is pray.

IT'S MORNIN', MOM!

     Good morning! Today at 7am, my usual wake-up time, it is very dark. Time is about to change, just ten more days. I was tempted to stay in bed and simply say, "We're changing time early." I usually walk with my husband to the truck to tell him goodbye and then go open up the chicken coop. Lately though, I've been waking the chickens. Oh, do they cause a ruckus when they are awakened early! Today, I shall let them sleep in.
     Although laziness just about took over this morning, I ran to the door in enough time to yell goodbye to my husband. I heard him shaking down the ash in the coal stove. There's been a chill in the air at night, even though the days are pleasant. I could hear in my mind my youngest saying, "It's mornin', Mom. Time to get up." He is very light dependent. When it's dark, he wants to sleep: when it's light, he wants to be up. All summer, no matter what time, if he woke up and the sun was shining, he would insist that we were up, too.
   The sun is starting to shine now. My little man just walked in, saying, "Mom, is it early in the morning?"
     "Un-huh."
      "Why is it early in the mornin?'"
     "Because the sun's just wakin' up."
     LOVE...It"s such a wonderful reason to wake up!
 

YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD MOM

   Last night, while at the 4-H Achievement Dinner, my youngest wanted me to go get him lemonade instead of the tea I had chosen him. My next to the youngest had already left to get a refill on his lemonade, so I told him to catch up to him so he could help him. The youngest begged and pleaded, but I kept telling him the same answer. Finally, he did as I told him. I had no idea I was being watched. The pastor's wife that was sitting down from us looked at me and said, "You're such a good mom. The way you quietly repeated what to do."
     I replied, "I've had lots and lots and lots of practice. And I didn't want my pork chop to get cold." The truth was, although I enjoyed getting a compliment, I know better. I know the truth. I have failed more times as a mother than times of being a good mom. I am a organizational nightmare. I can't keep up with the house, the kids, the laundry and the yard. I call the laundy room The Great Abyss, because I never see the bottom of it.  My temper is likely to show it's ugly head when the kids are fighting with each other or when they don't mind. And, my children fight with each other and , at times, they don't mind. At the funeral of my sister's mother-in-law, her children said that they had never heard their mother raise her voice. My children will never be able to say that. I have a country holler that would put thunder to shame. It's a good thing we live in the country. I walk outside and see a thousand things I need to do; then I walk inside and see a thousand and one things that need to be done. My one goal as a mother was that my children know our Lord and Savior, and I have failed at that with all the older ones. I heard on the radio that children were turning their backs on God because, although we take them to church, we don't model a relationship with God. I am guilty of that, too. I see so many people that do a better job than I ever could.
      BUT, I have been a blessed mom. God has filled my home with love. He has protected my children even when I have botched the job. He has fed us when we didn't have money. He has clothed us even through the hardest times. He has taught my children, so even the ones that deny His existence enjoy learning and have knowledgeable in a large variety of things. HE IS SUCH A GOOD FATHER! And, I am humbly honored that anyone would ever think that I was a good mom, but the truth is...I am a totally dependent mom, who, through the grace of God, has been given the opportunity to raise and LOVE these children.