MY DAY WITH MY OLDEST DAUGHTER

     Seventeen years ago, I had a precious little girl. We dressed her all in pink.  My husband was so thrilled about his first girl that he took a couple of days off of work and held her all day when I wasnt' feeding her. She grew and grew, becoming an animal lover. She was fascinated with horses, maybe because of Grandma Mona. She would ask her, "Do dogs have shoes? Noooo. Do cats have shoes? Noooo. Do horses have shoes? YES! Do people have shoes? YES!"
     One of her main loves in life is our dog, Sparkle. She was born to our dog, Fugi, when my daughter was three years old. Fugi had taken to running since the neighbor's dog came over when she was in heat. After that, we had to keep Fugi on a chain. When the three puppies were born, I thought Fugi would stay home with them, so I unchained her. We never saw her again. We became the puppies parents from the time they were a week old. We kept Sparkle. Sparkle has been a wonderful, stay-at-home member of the family. She was shown in 4-H and proved herself quite obedient, although she never would go through the tunnel.
     Last month, Sparkle lost her use of her right side. My husband carried her into the kitchen and the kids took turns sitting with her through the night. The next day, I had my husband carry her out to soak in the sun and be with the other animals. Slowly, she started learning to walk again. Her head is still tilted, but she can even run again. She's fourteen, though, so we know it's only a matter of time.

     Our other dog is a rambunctious pup who has adopted Sparkle as his mom, best friend and playmate. My daughter and I are concerned that when Sparkle passes, Rocky will, too, because he has been so dependent on her. So, yesterday, we went to the two shelters in town to find another dog. We have now decided that when you tell shelters that you have other dogs, cats, chickens, children, and plan on keeping a dog outside on a farm, you will be treated like some kind of cannibal. The people were kind enough in telling us they didn't want us to have any of the dogs. If they only knew how much our animals love their lives out here! They are pampered, but love being outside protecting us from every possum or owl that might show up during the night. They let us know when we have visitors or mail, too. It's a good life!

     After our rejection, we came home to talk about her plans for the future. We investigated what her options were for schools. She has a gift for sarcasm, always joking and teasing. Her future is looking very bright. I'm sure she will find a way to surround herself with dogs and cats all of her life. She is still my precious little girl, even if she never wears pink!

TALKING WITH DAD

     Today was a lovely day.  I was sitting outside peeling apples for candied apples when my dad came up to the picnic table to sit and talk for a while. At 76 years of age, he doesn't always feel as energetic as he used to and it's been especially bad this week. He was a truck driver for many years, a job that he loved. He loved to travel; he loved to drive; and he loved to talk. He knows the roads so well, I call him my GPS because
if we ever need directions, we call and he can get us to where we need to be.
     It didn't take long for our conversation to turn to his reminiscences about his time trucking. He told me that he would take any load they gave him. Because of that, they would give him short runs that would set him up to take long runs.Many of his fellow truckers didn't understand how he was getting the good runs, not understanding that it was his willingness to do the small jobs that made the long runs available to him. There's a lesson to be learned there!
     His next story was one I had heard before. He was ready to get another load. They had a room where the truckers would go to a phone and talk to a dispatcher to get their next load. The room was full of truckers. They weren't picking up the phones because everyone that was going to the phone was getting dispatched on a short run. Dad had called a friend at dispatch and asked him what the loads looked like. His friend said that the next dispatch would be a long run to Atlanta from Michigan.
    Dad strolled into the room. Everyone was sitting around shooting the breeze. Dad asked, "Who's next for the phone."
     They all said, "Go ahead. There aren't any good loads coming through."
     Dad said, "You all sure. I don't want to take a load you all want."
    Their reply was, "Go ahead. Nobody's got a good run all day."
    Dad walked over to the phone, picking
it up, "Yep, alright, Got it."
    "Where you going?" the curious onlookers asked, sure he would get a short run.
    "Atlanta," Dad replied casually.
    They didn't believe him. "Your lying! You didn't get an Atlanta."
    He just walked to the window to pick up the paperwork. The man handed it through to him, but one of the unbelieving drivers grabbed them. "Let me see where you're really going!" Checking the number, he said, "Atlanta!" All the drivers were jealous and angry, "How does he always get the good runs." If any one of them had just picked up that phone first, they would have had that run instead of him.
     

MY LIFE IS ABOUT TO CHANGE

     Today my oldest daughter goes to the license branch to take the driving test. How does a life change when children can drive themselves? My hope is that she will choose to be a responsible driver and I think she will be. I have worked with her for the past two years, practicing everything I think she might encounter.
     I learned something from a friend of my son who is now thirty and a decorated war veteran. He said that if someone jumped in his car, he would make them reject it. He was in control of a one ton lethal weapon. He would drive so that the person would be begging to get out. So, I have taught my daughter that a car is a lethal weapon. Use it carefully. Don't hurt yourself or others.
    I have increased worry with her starting to drive because a friend of hers just had an accident. Her mom trusted her driving, too. She missed a corner and went into a ditch, breaking her twelveth vertebrae. She will recover, but it has changed their lives. Four months in a back brace is a long time, especially walking with a cane.
     From now on, she will be able to take herself to violin practice, choir, 4-H, and the orchestra. I will have more time at home to take care of the other children and the house. She will be able to get a job. She can even help by running errands for me. I can see a lot of positives coming out of this.
     So today I will say a prayer that God will protect my oldest daughter and help her to make good decisions in her driving and her life. It isn't easy letting go and letting God take over, but it's a part of life, when the only thing a parent can do is pray.

IT'S MORNIN', MOM!

     Good morning! Today at 7am, my usual wake-up time, it is very dark. Time is about to change, just ten more days. I was tempted to stay in bed and simply say, "We're changing time early." I usually walk with my husband to the truck to tell him goodbye and then go open up the chicken coop. Lately though, I've been waking the chickens. Oh, do they cause a ruckus when they are awakened early! Today, I shall let them sleep in.
     Although laziness just about took over this morning, I ran to the door in enough time to yell goodbye to my husband. I heard him shaking down the ash in the coal stove. There's been a chill in the air at night, even though the days are pleasant. I could hear in my mind my youngest saying, "It's mornin', Mom. Time to get up." He is very light dependent. When it's dark, he wants to sleep: when it's light, he wants to be up. All summer, no matter what time, if he woke up and the sun was shining, he would insist that we were up, too.
   The sun is starting to shine now. My little man just walked in, saying, "Mom, is it early in the morning?"
     "Un-huh."
      "Why is it early in the mornin?'"
     "Because the sun's just wakin' up."
     LOVE...It"s such a wonderful reason to wake up!
 

YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD MOM

   Last night, while at the 4-H Achievement Dinner, my youngest wanted me to go get him lemonade instead of the tea I had chosen him. My next to the youngest had already left to get a refill on his lemonade, so I told him to catch up to him so he could help him. The youngest begged and pleaded, but I kept telling him the same answer. Finally, he did as I told him. I had no idea I was being watched. The pastor's wife that was sitting down from us looked at me and said, "You're such a good mom. The way you quietly repeated what to do."
     I replied, "I've had lots and lots and lots of practice. And I didn't want my pork chop to get cold." The truth was, although I enjoyed getting a compliment, I know better. I know the truth. I have failed more times as a mother than times of being a good mom. I am a organizational nightmare. I can't keep up with the house, the kids, the laundry and the yard. I call the laundy room The Great Abyss, because I never see the bottom of it.  My temper is likely to show it's ugly head when the kids are fighting with each other or when they don't mind. And, my children fight with each other and , at times, they don't mind. At the funeral of my sister's mother-in-law, her children said that they had never heard their mother raise her voice. My children will never be able to say that. I have a country holler that would put thunder to shame. It's a good thing we live in the country. I walk outside and see a thousand things I need to do; then I walk inside and see a thousand and one things that need to be done. My one goal as a mother was that my children know our Lord and Savior, and I have failed at that with all the older ones. I heard on the radio that children were turning their backs on God because, although we take them to church, we don't model a relationship with God. I am guilty of that, too. I see so many people that do a better job than I ever could.
      BUT, I have been a blessed mom. God has filled my home with love. He has protected my children even when I have botched the job. He has fed us when we didn't have money. He has clothed us even through the hardest times. He has taught my children, so even the ones that deny His existence enjoy learning and have knowledgeable in a large variety of things. HE IS SUCH A GOOD FATHER! And, I am humbly honored that anyone would ever think that I was a good mom, but the truth is...I am a totally dependent mom, who, through the grace of God, has been given the opportunity to raise and LOVE these children.